E: Today’s topic: Varieties of micro/macro brews and their drinkability. Drinkability ranges from 1 to 10, with 1 valued at “un-drinkable” and 10 being “I could drink it out of a warm keg and still want more”
I will begin with Leinenkugels, as I was a recent visitor to their brewery and learned much about seasonal varieties on their free (which was still too expensive) tour:
Original: 4 if it is the only beer available, i will still drink it, but may only have 2 or 3.
Honeyweiss: 8.5 the gold standard of Leiney’s. Loses points when lemon seeds fall into the beer or when the peel creates a chemical film on the top of the beer.
Berryweiss: 5 one of these is plenty, and 2 is pushing it. If i wanted fruity beer, i’d drink a wine cooler. also may result in instant headache syndrome (IHS)
HoneyBear (a mixture of Honeyweiss & Berryweiss): 5.5 end result: you just ruined a perfectly good Honeyweiss.
Summer Shandy: 8.5 perfect for the days when you’re still feeling a little dehydrated from the night before.
Sunset Wheat: 7 while this beer is great, it can get slightly heavy after a few, and the hangovers can be brutal.
Red: 7.5 never disappoints, but isn’t on the top of anyones list. its the default beer when you don’t feel like anything specific.
Creamy Dark: 1 if i had created a scale with negative values, this would rate negative infinity.
Big Butt: 3 only tried it once. don’t really remember it, but have the distinct feeling that i’d rather not try it again.
Oktoberfest: 6 necessary during that fall celebration, but should be drank in moderation. also results in IHS.
Light: ?? didn’t know it existed until the tour. thought about trying it, but refused to waste a free beer ticket on it when there were such other wonderful options.
Fireside Nut Brown: ?? again, didn’t know it existed and haven’t yet had the opportunity to try it. I would assume its similar to big butt, but i’m hoping its better.
K: The only Leinenkugel brews I have consumed are Berryweiss, Honeyweiss, Honeybear, and original. And, unfortunately, i agree with everything you’ve said in regards… I would go 5, 8, 6, 3 respectively. And I refuse to try Summer Wheat, because Hefeweizens are shit.
My microbrew of choice, I’m sure the suspense is killing you, will be Summit. A surprise I’m sure.
First of all, I will appreciate that it is a midwest/great plains brew and not available on the coasts. That would yuppify it. Also that it is domestic and often times appears on Happy hour tap specials even though it is far superior to your standard Bud, Miller, Blue Moon Honeyweiss selection.
On that note, let the judging begin:
Extra Pale Ale – 8.5. widely available, a great standard drinking beer. A little dark and bitter for most tastes (and for heavy duty drinking activities such as bongs), it is nonetheless sophisticated. Also packs a punch for drinking on a budget as two pints generally will suffice and it is available weekend nights for $3 at teh Imperial Room and $2 on Figlio HH (by far the best value of their happy hour selection) Curious how this might taste with green olives – may cut the bitter??
Extra Special Bitter – 3.5. Definitely an acquired taste.
Pilsener – 6. A nice rebuttal to typical czech/boho beers.
India Pale Ale – 6. A little hoppy for my tastes
Great Norther Porter – 7. Decent for a dark beer, but alas heavy.
Maibock – 4. Eh. Take it or leave it.
Scandia – 2. Wheat hops, need i say more.
Hefe Weizen – 1. Wheat Malt. Again, I don’t drink anything that tastes better with an orange slice. Would only drink if completely necessary and no moonshine were available.
Oktoberfest – 8. This beer is business and Oktoberfest isn’t just a clever name. And it’s like 8% alcohol content…
Winter Ale – 7.75. Oktoberfest only edges out based on alcohol content.
Oatmeal Stout – 8.01 this beer is FANTASTIC. Tastes like coffee and chocolate and beer…Unfortunately its a) super heavy a la Guiness so you can only drink 1, MABYE 2 on a good day and b) its seasonal, so that good day better be around November.